It’s easy to assume that because lockdowns ended years ago, children have simply “moved on.”
But in therapy rooms, schools and homes across the UK, we’re still seeing the ripple effects of the pandemic.
At Laura Greenwood Therapy, our team works with children, young people and families every day, and one thing has become increasingly clear: whilst life returned to normal on the surface, many children’s emotional, social and developmental journeys did not.
This isn’t about creating fear or blaming the pandemic for every challenge children face.
Instead, it’s about recognising that many young people experienced a significant disruption during some of the most important years of their development. When we understand that, we can respond with greater compassion, realistic expectations and practical support.
COVID-19 was a collective trauma
Unlike most difficult life experiences, COVID-19 happened to all of us at the same time.
No roadmap existed.
Families navigated uncertainty, fear, isolation, grief, taking on roles never meant for them like homeschooling, and working from home whilst juggling multiple needs at the same time.
As humans, we’re wired to respond to threat. During the pandemic, many of us lived in a prolonged state of survival, doing whatever we needed to get through.
Post ‘survival’ mode…there needs to be a period of feeling, to healing.
Whilst society largely returned to business as usual, many adults and children never had the opportunity to process what they experienced. Trauma doesn’t simply disappear because life becomes busy again. It stays with us until it’s acknowledged, understood and worked through.
Children missed far more than classroom learning
When people think about the impact of lockdown, they often focus on lost education.
Children lost far more than lessons.
They missed opportunities to:
- develop friendships naturally
- practise resolving conflict and managing challenge
- build confidence through everyday interactions
- become increasingly independent
- celebrate important milestones and transitions
- discover who they were within wider social groups
These experiences are fundamental building blocks of healthy emotional and relational development.
Many of today’s teenagers experienced the transition from primary to secondary school through a screen or under significant restrictions. They never had the chance to say goodbye properly to one chapter before beginning another.
For some, the emotional impact of those losses is only becoming apparent now.
Development didn’t stop — it changed
One of the biggest misunderstandings we continue to see is the expectation that children should simply have “caught up.”
Development doesn’t pause and then restart where it left off.
Instead, it adapts to the environment.
When children had fewer opportunities to socialise, collaborate, negotiate, solve problems together and build independence, those skills naturally developed differently.
Many young people are now being expected to demonstrate emotional regulation, resilience, organisation and social confidence that they simply had fewer opportunities to practise.
Sometimes it can help to think of a child as being socially or emotionally a little younger than their chronological age. That small shift in perspective often creates much more empathy and helps adults adjust expectations in ways that better support children’s development.
Not every child experienced lockdown in the same way
One important point is that there is no single “COVID generation.”
Some children actually felt safer during lockdown.
For those experiencing bullying, social anxiety or overwhelming school environments, being at home temporarily reduced their distress.
However, when schools reopened, many lost the avoidance strategies that had protected them, and returning to everyday life felt overwhelming.
Others experienced profound loneliness, isolation, reduced motivation and falling confidence throughout lockdown, leaving lasting emotional and academic gaps.
Although their experiences looked very different, both groups often returned to school having missed important opportunities for emotional, social and developmental growth.
What we’re still seeing today
Across our clinical work, alongside conversations with educators, several themes continue to emerge.
Many children are presenting with:
- increased anxiety and emotional overwhelm
- lower confidence
- difficulties with friendships and social communication
- separation anxiety
- emotionally based school avoidance (EBSA)
- challenges regulating emotions
- reduced resilience when faced with difficulties
In younger children, professionals continue to notice delays in speech and language development, emotional regulation and early social skills. Many teachers also describe increasing numbers of children requiring additional support within mainstream classrooms.
This doesn’t mean children are permanently damaged.
It means many are still adapting.
The rise in emotionally based school avoidance
One of the most significant patterns we’ve seen is an increase in Emotionally Based School Avoidance (EBSA).
During lockdown, home became the safest place many children knew.
Returning to full-time education wasn’t simply returning to school. For some, it meant leaving the place where they had felt safest for months or even years.
When distress isn’t recognised, or children are expected to cope before they’re ready, anxiety can escalate quickly.
This isn’t just about children being unwilling to attend school.
Often, they’re overwhelmed by fear, uncertainty or emotional distress.
The answer is rarely more pressure. Instead, children benefit from gradual exposure, consistent support and adults working together to build confidence over time.
How parents and schools can help
The encouraging news is that children are remarkably adaptable when they feel safe and supported.
Recovery isn’t about forcing children to “catch up.”
It’s about meeting them where they are.
Some of the most effective approaches include:
- acknowledging what children lost rather than minimising it
- creating opportunities to talk about difficult feelings
- listening with curiosity rather than rushing to fix
- celebrating small successes and gradual progress
- building consistent relationships with trusted adults
- working collaboratively between home and school
- adapting expectations when needed
- allowing confidence to rebuild gradually
Children don’t need perfection.
They need adults who are willing to understand them and their world.
What about parents?
Parents often tell us they worry that the pandemic somehow harmed their relationship with their child.
If that’s you, please know this:
Relationships can always be repaired.
Children don’t need perfect parents. They need parents who are emotionally available, willing to listen, able to apologise when needed and committed to showing love consistently.
Good enough parenting has always been enough.
One of the most powerful things parents can do is to care for their own emotional wellbeing too. Children benefit enormously from seeing adults process emotions in healthy ways and ask for support when they need it.
We are still writing the next chapter
The pandemic reshaped childhood for an entire generation.
That doesn’t mean this generation is destined to struggle forever.
Children are incredibly resilient, particularly when the adults around them understand what they’ve experienced and respond with empathy instead of expectation.
At Laura Greenwood Therapy, we believe healing happens through active listening to understand, connection, and compassionate support.
We cannot change what happened.
But together, we can help children make sense of their experiences, rebuild confidence, strengthen relationships and continue developing into emotionally healthy, resilient young people.
If you’re worried about your child, remember that you don’t have to navigate it alone. Seeking support isn’t a sign that you’ve failed as a parent. It’s often one of the most powerful ways to help your child thrive.
Acknowledgements
This article was written by the team at Laura Greenwood Therapy, bringing together the clinical expertise and observations of our therapists alongside insights from professionals working within education.
With thanks to:
- Laura Greenwood – Lead Psychotherapist & Founder, Laura Greenwood Therapy
- April Hill – Accredited Interpersonal Psychotherapist for Adolescents
- Lynne Churchill – Accredited Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapist for Children and Young People
- Julia Livesey – Member of the Laura Greenwood Therapy Editorial Advisory Board and Key Stage 1 Education Specialist
Together, their collective experience across psychotherapy, child and adolescent mental health, and education has informed the reflections and recommendations shared throughout this article.
