Here we honour Sarah’s voice and story. It shines a light on how Motherhood can re-trigger old traumas that have laid dormant for some time. So deeply pushed away that we had no idea they were quietly waiting in the background, ready to resurface.
Motherhood is one of those times when they often do.
It is a story that talks of how these old traumas came to the forefront in form of Tokophobia and crippling anxiety when breastfeeding in public.
It is a story that so many women carry. Of shame. From past experiences of abuse.
It is also a story of self-awareness. Whilst painfully bringing these past traumas to the forefront, it gives us the opportunity to heal.
Sarah. Thank you. Genuinely. For trusting me and the team with your story. For writing this down, sharing it with us and agreeing to share this on a public forum, to not only help others, but to move away from the feelings of shame I know you have carried for some time. A short message from Sarah….
“I would absolutely love more women to realise the impact abuse can have and the importance of seeking support. I am on a waiting list for therapy now that I know that it is still having an impact on my life today. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to share my story.”
Sarah’s Story – Healing from Childhood Sexual Abuse
When I was a teenager, I was sexually assaulted and groomed by an older man, and I developed Tokophobia. I thought I had moved on from this, as it was a long time ago.
However, recently I discovered that it is still having an impact on my life. Including my feeding journey. I have struggled to feed in front of anyone because I find it extremely difficult to expose my body. My little one is 2 and a half, and I spent my time feeding hidden away. Whether that be in toilets, at home in a closed room, in my car, or anywhere I could hide!
Now that I’ve realised why I was doing this, I am working on fixing this.
I fed for the first time in a forest recently, and it was the best feeling ever. My little one said, ‘he liked it because he could hear the birds. ‘
I would like to urge any Mummys out there who struggle with this to seek some support. I wish I had done it sooner
Sarah x
We hope that reading this gives you what you need. Validation. Solidarity in knowing you are not alone. That push you needed to recognise help and support is available. If any of the themes discussed here resonate with you and you have no idea where to start in seeking support, reach out and we will talk you through the different options available both within and outside of our team. Much of our work is not only about helping clients directly. But it is about making sure the get the support that is accessible for them too.
Laura x
